Lisha Cassibo has been writing for the Uxbridge Cosmos for two years, both as a freelancer and as a columnist. She has also written for several parenting magazines both here in Canada and for English publications in Switzerland. She graduated from Carleton University with an honours degree in Journalism and English Literature. She lives with her family in Sunderland.
My Million Dollar Year
So here we are, the beginning of February, and I am very proud to say that I have kept a New Year's resolution for the past 37 days. Minus one half hour. Not something many people can boast, I'm sure.
There were a few things I was fed up with in my life, and although I took care of a couple of them last year (we needn't go into detail), there were still a few things nagging at me. So I decided to take the bull by the horns, so to speak, and start to sort some things out. Life things, to be precise. Money things, to be more precise. I am so blinking tired of lying in bed at night worrying about how to pay the bills. I am tired of saying to my girls “We can't afford this, we can't afford that.” I am tired of counting every penny (what am I gonna do when I don't have THEM to count!!!) and still wondering how all the various and sundries that require good ol' cash are going to get paid for. I am tired of working five or six jobs just to bring in what seems like barely enough, sometimes. Now that I'm trying to maintain a household all on my own, it's even more daunting, more frustrating. More infuriating. Why does money never seem to be a problem for anyone else? Oh, I know - I just a resounding groan emitting from Uxbridge, everyone reading this sighing a collective “We ALL have money problems!” I won't go into a big moan, but I see a lot going on around me that I just can't participate in because the bank balance just won't allow it.
But that's all going to change. You see, back on January 1, I decided that 2013 is going to be my Million Dollar Year. That doesn't mean I'm going to earn/get/inherit/win/steal a million dollars. It just means that it's the year that it's all going to change. And going with this resolve is a feeling, a conviction somewhere in the pit of my stomach that feels good and positive. These aren't just words. This is really going to happen. I'm going to turn a corner with my life, somehow, and do whatever it takes to make my woes disappear. Or at least recede a little. OK, a lot.
The biggest decision I made is, I'm going to finally decide what I want to be when I grow up. Seeing as my life is probably around halfway through, I'm betting that a career on the stage is no longer an option. I'm OK with that - I find stages that will have 42-year old me, and that's enough. So I still get to live my dream. What is NOT living my dream is driving a bus, working in an office, waiting tables, etc., etc. I don't mind any of these jobs, and they put food in my family's bellies, but they're just that - jobs. I want to do something meaningful, something helpful, something I feel passionate about. I've started looking into going back to school (I know, that costs money) and am excited about the path I may head down. At a low point, I lamented to a friend that my father would roll over in his grave if he could see his university-educated daughter waiting tables for a living. My friend simply replied that he would not roll over if he could see that I was being creative in resolving what I saw as a problem. (As an aside, I'd be the first to tell my dad that serving is a heap of fun, and probably some of the best money I've ever made!) Anyway, it's time to get creative. I get a little worried that I may be 50 by the time I finally “become” something, but then I think “Hey, I'll be a insert-profession-here, and I'll have a tonne of life experience to boot - that'll make me the best insert-profession-here out there!”
I'm also going to work darn hard on changing my attitude. I'm going to stop worrying about what I don't have, and concentrate on what I do have. I'm going to budget better. I'm going to develop a strong relationship with my financial advisor. I'm going to succeed.
I did get some unfortunate financial news back at the beginning of January, and spent a lunch hour despairing over my future, wondering what I was doing wrong to make this happen to poor little me. That was the half hour I mentioned earlier. That's as long as I let my pity party last. Then I put my big girl panties back on and decided to work with it, rather than let it work me over. Maybe I'm just changing my karma, putting out to the universe what I want to actually have happen in my life. Wanting isn't enough, though. If you want, you'll just keep on wanting. I am going to do. Be. I don't just think it, I know it. It's happening. 2013 is going to be a very good year. A Million Dollar Year. Best ever. Yeah, baby.
